Saturday night, said Sapphire was acting up for Teresa. Trish just had her to quit using it and to move on. Charlotte was going to look at it in the morning. Well, about 3 or 4 the machine went into some massive trumpeting about it's own death that involved crashing the probe that sucks up all the blood into itself and bending it beyond repair. That part was okay because probes can be replaced, but it was still bad because Charlotte had to come in early to work on it. She's a very pleasant woman, Charlotte, and I like her a lot.
This is just background to make the next few bits make sense....
Charlotte asked if we had any specimens that were fresh so she could test her tweaks and probe replacement. We didn't and she said she would've offered her blood, but she thought that her bits and pieces would be too low for an accurate check. So we started volunteering others for it - looking for high hematocrits. Eventually Trish stated that, "We could ask Ryan, he's high." She was simply stating that, as the only guy on the shift, he would have a higher hematocrit. Men generally have a higher hematocrit than females. Ryan, on the other hand, only heard the statement Trish made and nothing about drawing blood. He was across the room in the Blood Bank. We're all sitting there discussing who is going to volunteer and we hear, "WHAT?!" Apparently, Ryan thinks were trying to say he's high.
Clearly, this was much funnier at five-thirty in the morning than it is now. It's still amazingly funny to me, but I get it
Today, we were discussing the death of said Sapphire. It wasn't repaired by Charlotte and isn't being used right now. I can't say "right now" for sure because I'm at home and I believe it is being repaired today. Anyway, there are two general statements that we've been making about the Sapphire:
"We had to offer it sacrifices," referring to the blood that was drawn to try to get the sucker to work.
And then there's, "We tried to transfuse it, but it had a transfusion reaction and died," referring to it's eventual death.
We're weird people, guys. I didn't really realize just how weird before I joined this group. And now we have Tracy who has just as sick and twisted a sense of humor as the rest of us. YAY!