llewej irol (icarianbird) wrote,
llewej irol
icarianbird

Anniversary

I had to go look it up in my journal because I couldn't actually remember, but yesterday was the year anniversary of my grandmother's death. This doesn't impact me as much as everyone else, because, for some strange reason, I seem to handle death differently. I don't actually cry or get upset. Yes, I miss my grandmother and I can cry for the loss of her, but otherwise I don't really do much crying (funerals don't count; I'm very empathetic and all the sadness there makes me completely sad thus why I don't go to many). I'm more worried about the impact that it has on the rest of the family - my mother, aunt, and grandfather. Pawpaw seems well adjusted. He has me so he hasn't necessarily lost his roommate. He essentially gained one just as loud, a little taller, and a lot messier. Oh, I know I can't compare to my grandmother and the love he had for her, but Juanita offered an interesting insight. I look almost exactly like my mother did when she was young my age (she still acts young) and, though he lost a wife, he gained his "little girl" back when I moved in. Of course, I am not my mother and I don't cause half the problems she did when she was my age, but it makes a little bit of sense. I'm just glad I could be here. I enjoy staying with my grandfather. It's nice to have a roommate that reminds me of my brother. Lol.
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